1. A kitchen worker hits a water rat on the head to stun it before it is killed for a meal in a restaurant in the southern Chinese city of Guangzhou. This doesn�t actually show the water rat getting it in the head � with a large wooden mallet, I might add � but the photo does suggest that the kitchen worker is in mid-swing. Therefore, we can safely assume that we are looking at the last moment of a water rat�s life. Was that life meaningless? Can we presume to know?
2. A newborn Meerkat drinks milk from a baby bottle held by caretaker Adrian Sestelo at the Buenos Aires Zoo, Argentina Thursday, April 3, 2003. Meerkats, originating from South Africa are in danger of extinction. Cruelty to rats is more popular than kindness to meerkats. Noted. The meerkat is being held by a man seen in profile, who is wearing surgical scrubs and a respiratory mask. It is looking right at the camera, and I guess it�s cute, if that�s your thing.
3. Auckland University of Technolgy researchers Dr. Steve O'Shea and Cat Bolstad, right, are seen with a Colossal Squid at the Te Papa research laboratory in Wellington, Wednesday April 2, 2003. The squid, which was found by fishermen in the Ross Sea, Antarctic, last week, is thought to be the largest intact specimen to have been found. The 150-Kilogram (330 pound) 5-meter (16 foot) immature female Mesonychoteuthis hamiltoni squid has eyes as big as dinner plates and razor-sharp hooks on the tentacles. The researchers appear to be wearing white go-go boots, though I am probably wrong about that.
4. Supreme Mufti Talgat Tadzhuddin speaks at a news conference in Moscow in this March 19, 2003, file picture. Russian Muslims have declared a jihad, or holy war, against the United States, Russia's top mufti said Thursday April 3, 2003, according to the Interfax news agency. Supreme Mufti Talgat Tadzhuddin wouldn't say what specific actions the fight would take, but said the first results would be visible within two or three days. I can�t think of why Supreme Mufti Talgat Tadzhuddin has made the grade except for the probability that everyone who sends it is including the message, "Dude, doesn�t this guy look exactly like Robin Williams?"
5. Aishwarya Rai, a former Miss World, is in talks to appear in the next James Bond movie. Hot "exotic" chick with long hair, heavy-lidded eyes, Western features, and gobs of makeup. Self-explanatory.
6. A prostitute waits for clients on a street corner. A Swedish prostitute has for the first time been recognised as a service provider � making her responsibile for taxes and social security on her income. This photo shows the prositute from the waist down, with one foot on the pole she�s leaning against. She is wearing stylish platform slides and a hot pink midriff-baring shirt, but it�s all about the bright yellow pedal-pushers and the awesome glutes they encase. I like the way Yahoo! wholesomely linked the words "social security," in that caption, to its index pages on that topic.
7. Mascot "Clammy Sosa" seemingly eats a bat boy during the minor league baseball season opener on Thursday, April 3, 2003, in Memphis, Tenn. The Memphis Redbirds were defeated 3-2 by the Albuquerque Isotopes. Commentary fails me.
8. Model and designer Paris Hilt*n, left, and her sister, model Nikki Hilt*n, pose for photographers where fashion designer Jeremy Scott unveiled his fall collection, Thursday night, April 3, 2003, in Los Angeles. I have occasionally wondered, in the spirit of scientific inquiry, whether anyone in the world cares about the Hilt*n sisters except their friends, their drug dealers, and their press agent. Interestingly, it seems that the answer is yes. Thank you, Yahoo! I have learned something today.
9. A model of the famous Bavarian castle Neuschwanstein where King Ludwig II of German State of Bavaria ruled in the 19th century, is unveiled at the Legoland leisure park in Guenzburg, Bavaria, southern Germany Friday April 4, 2003. The castle is made out of 300,000 Lego pieces, weighs 300 kilos (661 pounds) and took 6 months to build as a new attraction of the Legoland park. I bet I have personally met at least a handful of people who are responsible for getting this photo on the list, and here�s a shocker � they all play Dungeons and Dragons, and they all work in high tech.
10. Actor Vin Diesel poses at the Chateau Marmont hotel in the Hollywood section of Los Angeles, June 11, 2001. Diesel stars in the upcoming movie, "The Fast and the Furious." This one�s weird because first of all the photo is so old � I min, Vin is hardly a phenom anymore. Has he done something newsworthy in the last few days that I am not aware of? I like it better if he hasn�t, and maybe in that case an enterprising social scientist can come up with a theory of the heretofore accountable Vin Diesel photo meme. It�s also gross because he is wearing a loose-fitting v-neck t-shirt and baggy faded jeans � not worn jeans, the kind you buy already faded to a heathery baby blue. With this outfit, and the way he�s sitting on the stairs, in shadow, with a look on his face like he was talking when the shutter snapped, you can�t even tell he has muscles or tattoos, and he could be anyone�s chubby, frat-boy cousin. American women, is this emasculated, tampon-commercial doppelganger the Vin Diesel you truly hold close to your hearts? No wonder this country is going to hell.
11. A Taiwanese woman puts a mask on her kitten to protect her against a highly infectious pneumonia virus in central Taichung City on March 30, 2003. Taiwan's health department has banned all people with the highly infectious Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) from entering or leaving the island to try to halt the spread of a mystery pneumonia that has killed nearly 60 people worldwide. Picture taken March 30, 2003. This cat is also wearing a pink bandanna and a blue necklace. I think its owner may need help.
12. A combination photograph shows fashionable masks worn by people in Hong Kong to protect themselves against the Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) in this April 2, 2003 file photo. Residents of Hong Kong, always quick to spot a fashion trend, are turning to colorful surgical masks to beat the blues as a deadly virus stalks the territory. OK, kittens wearing respiratory masks are more popular than people wearing respiratory masks, unless the people are also holding meerkats. Are meerkats inherently more popular than kittens?
13. "Lord of the Rings" star Liv Tyler married her longtime musician boyfriend, Royston Langdon, in a private ceremony in the Caribbean on March 25, Tyler's publicist said April 3, 2003. Tyler is seen at the premiere of "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers" in Paris, December 10, 2002. If that�s not a boob job, I don�t know what is.
14. Chief Hospital Corpsman David Jones of the 15th Marine Expeditionary Unit holds two-hour-old newborn Rogenia Katham, daughter of Jamila Katham, 20, at the at the 15th MEU in Nasiriyah, Iraq, Thursday, April 3, 2003. Shortly after sunrise, F Company Marines guarding the perimeter of the 15th MEUs area were approached by Jamila's family, who were needing assistance. The Marines radioed from their post to their operations center and a military ambulance was sent to pick up the expecting mother. Jamila gave birth at about 8 a.m to Katham, who was healthy and weighed approximately six pounds. Human interest. Nice composition, good lighting. Hope amid war, a beacon for the next generation, etc.: also self-explanatory. Boob jobs are more popular than human interest.
15. Polish special forces arrive on a U.S. Navy Seals' boat in the port of Umm-Qasr in southern Iraq to hand over captured Iraqis March 23, 2003. Iraqi troops and paramilitary fighters loyal to President Saddam Hussein held up a U.S. advance toward Baghdad on Sunday, inflicting casualties and taking U.S. prisoners on the fourth day of war. Another mystery. Polish pride? All you can see of the soldiers are their noses. The frame is very cluttered and looks like a hybrid of "The Wild Ones" and "Mad Max."
16. Iraqi President Saddam Hussein, seen in this image from video, appears in an unannounced television broadcast on Iraqi television Friday, April 4, 2003. Hussein urged Iraqis to strike at the U.S.-led coalition now at the gates of Baghdad. Don�t you think Saddam Hussein looks like a cartoon character from the golden age of Hanna-Barbera? Also, his beret is too small. (Is it a raspberry beret? Too dark to tell.)
17. Steve O'Shea examines a giant squid. Fishermen in the Ross Sea, near Antarctica, have reeled in a colossal squid measuring almost nine metres in length. Why is this squid picture so much less popular than the other one? The other one is shot from farther away, so you can�t dig the biology as well, and this guy looks happier than the other two, one of whom has such a dour, peevish expression on her face that I kind of want to slap her: Lady, you�re touching the largest intact specimen to have been found! Just think about the paper you�re going to get out of this � Would a little enthusiasm, a smile, have been so much to ask? I�m sorry your sister is prettier, but it�s time to let go.
18. This November 2002 file photo taken in Morrow Bay, Calif., shows a five-month-old sea lion nicknamed "Arrow," after she was found with an arrow that was shot from a crossbow, lodged in her neck. Two men and a San Diego-based sportfishing company were charged Thursday, April 3, 2003, with violating the federal Marine Mammal Protection Act in connection with the shooting. Arrow was rehabilitated at the Marine Mammal Center in Sausalito, Calif., and released back to the wild in February. Cruelty to rats is more popular than cruelty to sea lions, which was never a revolutionary hypothesis to begin with. Cruelty to animals in general is more popular than animals wearing respiratory masks. The younger of the two men facing charges sounds like a real sick fuck. The older one had a beef to pick because the seals were eating his bait, he is some kind of commercial fisherman, but according to police the younger guy acknowledged that he just likes shooting sea lions with a crossbow and comes along for the ride.
19. Egyptian conjoined twins, Ahmed and Mohamed Ibrahim, are seen in this file photo taken on March 6, 2002, in a Cairo hospital. Surgery to separate the conjoined 22-month-old Egyptian twins could be delayed or canceled unless $125,000 is raised to help offset the estimated $2 million cost, a hospital official said. "One surgery could completely wipe out all the funds of the foundation," director Sue Blackwood told The Dallas Morning News for Wednesday, April 2, 2003 editions. Actually, this is not true. The surgery department at that hospital put out a wire item yesterday saying that they don�t know what that woman is talking about, since they have always planned to perform the surgery first and worry about the money later.
20. People enjoy cherry blossoms in full bloom on rowboats at Chidorigafuchi imperial moat in Tokyo Thursday, April 3, 2003. Tens of millions of people across the country take pleasure in viewing the annual cherry blossoms. I am overjoyed that this � dare I characterize it as inscrutable? � snapshot of mundane natural beauty is the one that concludes our photographic exploration of 12:15 pm on April 4, 2003: the peace that passeth understanding, you know? In the background are what looks like office complexes, and the people in them would have a view of a lush-banked inlet on which boaters drift in turquoise bottomed canoes, all under a thickly flowered pinky-white canopy of spring flowers. Shanti.

Getting the donuts this morning � Melissa paid me back for them since they were for a meeting of hers, I have spoiled everyone on the Top Pot action and ruined them for Winchell�s � driving around that part of Capitol Hill looking for parking, I suddenly remembered the Conquistador d�Amor. I can�t believe how young I was back then, it doesn�t seem possible.